BOYS VS GIRLS

Okay - so I found this onesie today on Oldnavy.com - "Mommy's little FIRECRACKER '08". Isn't it the cutest? I know that so many are already telling me, attempting to prepare me, warning me, whatever you want to call it - that boys are SO different than girls. I agree, don't get me wrong. There have definitely been some differences that I've noticed already in just getting ready for this little prince.

This pregnancy has been completely different than with Mackenzi. Who knows whether it's because I'm having a boy this time or not - all the parental researchers out there (meaning the ones who have birthed children) are telling me that's the reason. . .boys vs girls. . .medical professionals (meaning my doctor - who by the way has had a boy and a girl) tells me that it's basically just the additional hormones - loosening of all the things inside that get moved around when having another baby. . .and not necessarily boys vs girls.

Another notable difference is in the fact that my priorities are somewhat different. Again, is it because of the whole boys vs girls thing - or just second child? I don't know. I had so many things still saved from having Mackenzi - crib, swing, carseat, etc. . .that I didn't have to worry with those things. I don't know if "worry" is even the right word, to "occupy my attention" may be better. Still no definite answer as to the reason - with Levi, we have a room available for him, we're not just trying to make a tiny space work. So, I have the luxury of planning how I want his room to look - painting, furniture, window treatments, etc. . .

Clothing is definitely a difference. When I was pregnant with Mackenzi, so many told me how wonderful it was that I was having a girl, because girl clothes shopping was SO much more fun than boy clothes shopping. I have been blessed to be a recipient of many hand-me-downs for Levi. I was given many clothes with Mackenzi - but I guess there was that excitement when I would walk into a store and see all of the sweet little dresses, bows, shoes, socks, etc. I have definitely been enjoying checking out all the little boy things - plaid shorts, cute little baseball hats, precious shoes, fun little car toys. . .and so I am not feeling the pain of shopping for boys yet that everyone has told me about. They seem to have a variety of things. . .maybe it's just been the 5 year time span, I don't know, more variety. But, it seems to me that I'll have fun regardless. I know I've helped with my nephews' clothes shopping and that's a lot of fun.

One thing though, with the clothing - and it has encouraged this blog - is that I haven't been too anxious about what Levi will wear home from the hospital. I seriously have an abundance of hand-me-downs to go through and I've bought a few little outfits. One, unfortunately I bought and left in the shopping cart at Kohls, never to be seen again - even after my mom's attempt to go back within 30 minutes and my phone call to the store the next day. But, nevertheless, I wasn't too terribly upset. It was frustrating, mostly that I left it there. . .I was attempting to coordinate a little onesie to go under the little jumper. Oh well. Brian and I have sort of coined the phrase, "Our little firecracker!" and so when I saw this onesie at Old Navy, I just had to buy it! I called the store to see if they sell them in there, and they don't. So, I bought it online. It is so cute, and so appropriate! Much cheaper than Kenzi's going home outfit, that's for sure. So, I guess in some ways, that's one of the differences between boys and girls. Which, for those of you who know me, saving money on something is always a plus! I do love that it has the year he's born too.

Shower at Grace Presbyterian Village 5-9-08

We had a great time on May 9 at my shower at my work, Grace Presbyterian Village. Mom came into town on Thursday and spent that time with us. It was a lot of fun. Many people came together and collectively, they bought us much needed items like diapers, bottles, lotions, etc. . .little things a little boy needs. We have kept many things from having Mackenzi, but some of them are girl specific, and so we were grateful to receive some little boy items. Mom made a blanket and is working on a little lap blanket as well. Mackenzi especially had a great time. She was very excited to get things for little Levi. She is excitedly showing off the sign a friend of mine's husband made for Levi where everyone signed. We'll plan to have the sign at the hospital for our visitors there too. What a sweet idea. Thanks, Jeanice and Randy! Me, Mom, Kenzi and Aunt Carolyn This is my sweet friend, Jeanice. Her husband helped with the sign for Levi!
Kenzi showing off all that little Levi got at the shower! She's not excited at all! :)

30 Weeks

Well, I finally had access to a camera this past weekend - my mom and sister were in town. We got a hair-brained idea to add some more color to Levi's room and painted about a 29inch border around the bottom of the room in a darker blue. It has really made a difference in the room, and I'm pretty pleased with it. Things are continually coming together. Kari brought back some items that she had borrowed with her latest little one and so Mackenzi had a great time playing with them - the car seat, megasaucer, more clothes, shoes. . .etc. . .she was even dressing up a couple of her babies in Levi's clothes!

We also had a soccer game on Saturday - we have quite the little star! She scored 7 goals this past Saturday. It was great to see her so enthusiastic about the game. She was definitely having a great time. Here's a great shot of her scoring one of the goals!

1 day shy of 28 weeks

Goodness. . .two blogs in one week. . .I'm not sure what that's indicative of. . .I've spent more time on my computer the past couple of days, I guess. Nothing more than that.

Last night I worked on Levi's baby book. There were some pages that I really liked about Mackenzi's baby book, and so I've managed to create them for Levi's book. It's made me feel better about his book. I love it - don't get me wrong, but I know that I want my kids' baby books to tell a story for them. One of the pages I've included is how mommy and daddy met. I wrote it when I did Mackenzi's book, and just basically copied it for Levi's book. There are things about Brian and I meeting that I had forgotten. I was a little frustrated about that fact. As time grows on - some of the details of our memories fade, I guess. Which is all the more reason I want them recorded, especially for our children. It's so important in this day and age for them to know and see how our love for each other began and grew in the Lord through our wedding day and each day we are together. So, now that I have the pages created, I just need to print them, and put them in the book. There are some where I'll need to write things in - and as crazy as this sounds, I can't find the "right" pen/marker. It seems like that was much more available when I had Mackenzi, but I've been to many stores and can't find the right one. I want to be as consistent with it as I can, but goodness. . .I just need a good pen. I was hoping to go to Hobby Lobby today, but didn't get there.

Another thing I've been feeling this week is some anxiety toward my delivery. At the top of the blog is a ticker for the time remaining until my due date. Just 12 weeks and 1 day - it's amazing to me how this little one is growing inside of me. I don't think that feeling will ever change - I felt it with Mackenzi and I feel it with Levi. I guess, though, because I have experienced a miscarriage, and I've seen how God's plan was different for that baby than for Mackenzi and Levi, I have a tainted view of things. I have that fear that wells up inside of me and it takes a concerted effort for me to really work to play that down. And at the same time, it's frustrating for me to feel that fear, so then I get upset with myself. It's a terrible cycle that has lasted throughout this pregnancy. There is such a joy in feeling this baby move and roll and slide under my pelvic bone that I know it's all going to be fine. God has a plan. People have babies all the time. Women are in labor all the time.

Mackenzi's playing in Levi's room right now. Our computer is still currently in his room as well, so that's where we are. I hear her reciting scripture as she's playing with her babies - pretending to be at school or church, I don't know specifically because I don't want to disturb her, or make her aware that I hear her. She'll get embarrassed - but what an encouragement. As I'm writing about my fears, she's speaking of fearing no evil, for Thou art with her, His rod and staff they comfort her. Then she's saying, "Thy kingdom come, thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven."

Mom and I were talking yesterday about the awesome privilege it is to bring up our children to know and hear of the Lord. Mackenzi has a great interest in knowing what God desires of her and following what he commands. We love our church, Rockway. She, along with us, have developed wonderful friends there, and I know Levi already is loved by them. They have prayed with us, and the girls in my Bible study rejoiced with us when we found out we were pregnant. One day in church Kyle, our community pastor, was talking about our church as a community - and tears flooded my eyes as I realized that this little boy inside of me is God's child. Not mine, I'm just the carrier of him. The mother of him. . .the one designated to lead and guide him to do God's will. That's why he's growing inside of me. To serve our God. I also realized how much Rockway has played a part in this pregnancy - and will play a part in his growing up there - just as Mackenzi has. She is so comfortable there, and loves her Sunday School teacher and those who work with her in her class. In August when we have promotion Sunday, she'll move on up into Kids Rock. I can already see the molding that is taking place inside of her heart and her mind. She has learned so much about Jesus this past year. She inquires, she is retaining, and she's repeating. I pray so intensely that she will carry this love she has all of her life. She's a strong girl - we've known that from day one - and she has the potential to lead others. She showed it today on the soccer field. One of the little girls is new to playing, and Mackenzi took it upon herself to explain which way they were going for that quarter. She pointed out her goal. She pointed out which way they needed to be looking and running.

I pray for Levi too - that he'll be strong like she is. According to the birth order book, we are technically starting out with a first child again - five years will have elapsed between Mackenzi and Levi - While I know how difficult it was with a strong willed one, especially that first year - I know the payoffs that are involved as well. I just pray that Brian and I will be the parents that God has designed us to be for these two little ones.

Sorry to be so long winded this time. . .maybe I'll get my camera fixed so I can start adding pictures of my belly again. I'd love to add some of Levi's room that we've started on as well. I hate that my camera has broken in the middle of this. Until next time. . .

27 weeks and 4 days

Okay, okay, okay! I don't have much of an update. I don't have a new picture because unfortunately I broke my camera and still have yet to get it fixed! But, I am doing well. . .other than the normal, exhaustion, tiny bit of swelling, irritability, oh - and did I say exhaustion? I went to the doctor almost 4 weeks ago now when I was 26 weeks and everything was going well. They did start me on iron pills because my iron level was really low, explaining the exhaustion. Unfortunately I still don't feel all that energized most of the time, but hopefully that will pass! Who knows! The baby was doing just fine. He does get the hiccups here and there, and tends to stay down in my pelvic bones!

Kenzi has had a great time watching my stomach move around like crazy. At first she couldn't feel him move with her hand, but then one day put her face to my belly and felt the movement on her cheek. It was so fun to watch her feel him move. Now she refuses to just feel with her hand and wants to bury her face into my tummy to feel him move. He does respond to her voice, and moves almost every time she does put her face to my tummy. She always says, "Hi, Levi!" It's precious.

We did paint his room last weekend too. Again, no pictures to show yet. We got the crib put together and also the curtains put up; however, we need to rehang the curtains. We tried to use the existing holes from the previous curtains, but that obviously didn't work - so maybe this weekend we can get that taken care of.

I go to the doctor this next Wednesday for my 28 weeks and then I'll start going every other week. Time is starting to speed up some. I'll try to post something after my appointment next week!

22 Weeks Pregnant

What an amazing opportunity it is to be carrying a baby perfectly forming in my belly. It has truly been a blessing thus far, and I know that it will only continue. Sure, there have been times that I've been scared, scared, and well, more scared. . .but, God has always been in control. Even in the times that I wasn't aware or allowing myself to believe He was in control, He was. It's easy now, that I feel Levi moving all the time to let myself get caught up in other things. . .like, the nursery - what color will we paint the walls, what bedding will we choose. . .how will we take care of all the things that already are in Levi's room - that need to be put somewhere else?! Where's the trust in all of that? Believing and knowing that it will all come in time. . .and to not worry myself so much about it. Friends at work tell me I'm feeling this way because I'm pregnant - and while that may be true - I am reminded that this little prince in my belly is the most important part of this pregnancy. . .not whether I'll have his room perfect for his arrival, or whether everything will work the way I plan it to. . .but, I'm reminded of the miracle that God has formed. . .growing. . .kicking. . .moving. . .and I'm humbled.

I decided to finally take a picture of me - it was the Friday before I was 22 weeks. . .pretty good depiction of my belly. . .although the shirt is very concealing. . .this growing belly is evidence of God's goodness in our lives and I don't want to let a moment go by that I let myself lose sight of that!

Pictures of our Little Levi!

This is a side profile of him - his head on the left side and his leg is coming up on top. This one shows his boy parts as indicated on the sonogram. His bottom is on the ride side, and the arrow is pointing to the evidence. The white line below is his left leg bone.
This is a picture of his heart - beating at 136bpm.
And this is another shot of his face, only straight on - you can see his eyes and his forehead - then the other part to the right of his head is his belly.
SO PRECIOUS!

LEVI ASHTON KREYMER

Yesterday was our sonogram to find out if the baby is doing great - which HE is! He's measuring 20 weeks and 6 days, where I'm at 20 weeks 3 days. The technician assured me that as long as we're within a two week time frame, all is well. So, no worries. I'm still at a two pound weight gain - which is not a problem either. . .the baby is growing just fine. It was such an awesome experience seeing the baby moving around on the monitor and hearing that each area of his body that was measured was right on track. . .his head, his kidneys, his spine, his 4 chambered heart. . .just incredible. It did take quite a while for little Levi to show us that he's a boy. Literally, she had me turning on my side, and back again on my back. . .then pushing like crazy on my belly trying to get him to uncross those legs at the knees! But, he finally revealed what we were looking for, and all is well! After the sonogram was over, the technician was able to tell me that he was 9 inches long from head to toe and weighed 13 ounces.

Mackenzi and Brian were with me in the sonogram, but Brian had to head back to work right afterwards. Kenzi really didn't say much, and Brian and I both didn't say too much either - I think we really felt like we were having a boy, so it was just confirmation, I suppose. We both realized that it was possible we'd leave there a little surprised, but really didn't expect to leave with pink on the mind.

I waited for the doctor, and managed to give mom a quick call to let her know that we were having a boy - and then when the doctor didn't come in right away - I decided to send a text message to people in my phone book - "It's a boy!" that's all it said. . .but, because I hadn't seen the doctor yet, I couldn't answer the several phone calls and many texts that I received back. It was quite hilarious though - I think I had about 10 texts and 3 messages by the time I finished with Dr. Finke and made it to the desk to check out. The lady behind the desk realized that I had text messages and seemed concerned about whether my husband knew what we were having yet! But I explained that he was in the room with us - and then she remembered seeing him head on out previously.

Kenzi and I headed to Academy to get her a soccer ball for practice that was supposed to start today, but she didn't like their selection. They really only had one ball in her size - so I agreed. . . and so we went to Target. We got the ball, and then Kenzi and I decided that Levi needed something too! So we picked out a little romper with construction trucks on it. It's so precious.

To our surprise, when we watched our video of the sonogram last night, we were able to hear the heartbeat audibly! It was really fun!

I hope to upload pictures as soon as I can, so they are forthcoming!

Talks about God

Last night I had the opportunity to talk with Mackenzi about God. It's not that this was the first time, mind you, but she said something to me that really impressed upon me how her mind functions! A dear friend of mine called me and asked for prayer for her dad, who had stopped breathing. She was frantic, and in the middle of knowing whether he was going to live or not. Unfortunately he was unable to be revived, and Mackenzi heard me tell Brian after I hung up the phone that he had passed away and had gone to be with Jesus. It sparked some questions that she had in her mind - like, "Will he ever come back?" "Is he dead?" "Where is he?" And so I turned out conversation from the fact that Robin's dad had passed away to more that while he is not here on earth, he is living in Heaven because he chose to accept Jesus into his life and to live for him. I explained to her that one day she will make that decision to ask Jesus into her heart and will choose to live for him as well. Then she informed me that God was in her heart. Which I agreed, that God is living inside of us. Then she asked me if she'll die. Which, I did tell her that one day, yes, she will die as well - but if she accepts Jesus into her heart, she will live with him in Heaven after she dies. Then she looked at me, puzzled, and asked, "Well, if I ask Jesus to come into my heart, will God just get out?" What a very practical way to view God and Jesus living in her heart - and her feeling that they can't do it at the same time. Of course she can't understand the Trinity - but, I just explained to her that they could both live in her heart, there would be no need for choosing between the two. I was so glad to have this "open" conversation with her, because it occurred to me after she asked that question, what if she never asked the question, and was afraid to ask Jesus to come into her heart for fear of "kicking" God out?

12 weeks down. . .

I went to the doctor this past Wednesday and despite my crazy fears. . .the baby is doing GREAT! The heartbeat was strong at 164 this time. At my 8 weeks visit, the heartbeat was 176. I scanned the sonogram pictures from my 8 week visit. The top one is of the heartbeat being measured and the second one is pointing at the baby's heart that was beating so strongly. To the right of the arrow is the baby's head and legs and arms are to the left. It's truly incredible, and now that I've exceeded the 12th week visit, I feel like I can finally rest and enjoy this pregnancy without worrying so much. I've known from the beginning that God is in control, but I've certainly struggled to not worry myself crazy!

Thanks for continued prayers, they keep me going from day to day!

Week 10 - December 10th

I'm in week 10 of my pregnancy. It's very exciting to be this far, and things to seemingly be doing well. It's incredible, as much as it was when I was pregnant with Kenzi, to know that there is a baby growing inside of me - forming all they need to live in this life! It is so humbling. And I think that because it has been such a challenge, that I feel I can appreciate this experience so much. The past couple of days have been challenging for me as I have wanted to get so much accomplished, and attempt to - but then realize that resting is really what my body desires!

Mackenzi is so excited. When people find out I'm pregnant, one of their first or second questions is what does Mackenzi think of the baby? It doesn't take much if you know her to know that she is more than thrilled. She is attacking my belly all the time wanting to kiss it and touch it. The other night she asked me if when the baby comes out, when the baby is still small, can he or she sleep with her? This past weekend I went to get my hair done. It was early Saturday morning, and she wanted to go with me to the salon. I kept telling her that she needed to stay home and play, that there is nothing for her to do while I'm getting my hair done. Well, then she said, "But Mom, I need to be with the baby!" Very creatively manipulative! But, nonetheless, I told her she needed to stay at home. She would be fine. Several weeks ago she told me on the way home from school that she had invited a few people to the hospital. Then she named some from our family and about 3 or 4 kids from her class at school. She was determined that they would all be there. It's really funny, and a joy to see her experience this pregnancy in her own way. She's so loving and caring.

Tomorrow is my 8th wedding anniversary to Brian. It's very exciting. Mackenzi is going to stay with Natasha and Jeremiah while we go to dinner. It will be fun. We haven't spent much time together lately with all that's been going on. It seems like we're always going in different directions. I'm looking forward to it. I love having my anniversary in December because it does help us to stop doing all the Christmas shopping and decorating and allows us an opportunity to just spend some quality time together.

New Life. . .

The past month has been very exciting and tiring at the same time. I have been extremely exhausted, due to the new life that's growing inside of me, and haven't kept up with my blog all month. My routine lately has been to go to work, come home, go to bed. And the weekends have consisted of me laying around, resting the whole time. A couple of weeks ago, we went to Spring to see my parents and I kept telling my mom that I felt like I was drugged - just too tired to get off her couch.

This past Monday was my first doctor's appointment. Things have changed since I was pregnant with Mackenzi - then I went in immediately after discovering I was pregnant through a home test, the doctor's office confirmed my pregnancy through a blood test, and then at 6 weeks I had my first appointment to hear the baby's heartbeat. . .then I went from there. However, now, they basically say that home tests are accurate, and they just schedule an appointment for 8 weeks. I was pretty anxious as is to be expected for this appointment that was on Monday. Sunday, specifically, I struggled all day with the fear I was experiencing. Brian wasn't going to be able to go with me, but then near the end of last week, he managed to work it out so he could be there. I was grateful for that! He met me there as I was being called back. We had a different sonogram technician (and I was secretly glad for that difference). When the baby came up on the monitor and the technician pointed out the heartbeat right away, I lost it. I was shaking fiercely. . .and then she made it so we could hear the heartbeat, and it just really was incredible. I finally stopped crying and was able to see the screen. She gave us 3 pictures of the baby and although the baby is still so small, with the magnified picture, you can see the outline of the baby's head, arms, legs, and the heart. It's more than incredible. I couldn't stop praising God, and still can't! I'm so thankful for the life growing inside of me.

The rest of my visit went smoothly as I was able to see Dr. Finke. Then I headed on into work. . .and over the next couple of days, it became so clear to me that I was more fearful before the appointment than I even realized. Just in the last few days, I've had more energy (although I'm still completely spent by the afternoon/evening), but there's motivation now that wasn't there before. There's a joy that I feel knowing that the baby is doing just fine.

I'm so thankful to know of the many people who have lifted us up in prayer. A friend of mine told me the other day that she pictured me like the character on Peanuts who has the cloud over their head. . .and said that for me, it's like she sees this cloud of prayer covering me and my baby growing inside me. . .and I truly believe that. God is the ultimate designer of my life. There's no understanding what happened a year ago - and there's no explanation as to why this baby will likely survive. . .what has become very clear to me is that whether here or in heaven, my children belong to God. They are His from the beginning and throughout. What I prayed specifically for this time is that He will let me hold this one, and raise him/her to love Him. I'm so thankful for all the support that I have received. I don't know how people don't feel community and don't have support for times like this. I pray that I seize the opportunity to partake in supporting other people going through difficult times. . .to return the love that I've felt.

This baby is loved. By me and all those praying, including one little 4 1/2 year old girl who can't wait to love on her baby brother or sister.

Fall Festival

We had a great time this past Saturday night at Mansfield's Fall Festival. Mackenzi decided that she would be a princess for the festival. She had gotten a costume for her birthday that was precious and so last week we found her some cute shoes to go with the dress from the Disney store that lit up when she walked. I decided to french braid her hair "backwards" so that all her hair would be on top of her head. . .it worked out really well, and for most of the night, she was able to keep her crown on top of her head. I also decided at the last minute that it would be fun to put makeup on her, and she definitely agreed with the idea! I had no idea her eyelashes were that LONG!

We picked up Natasha and Jeremiah. Jeremiah was dressed up as a cowboy, complete with wranglers, a belt buckle, boots, hat, and a gun, that unfortunately didn't make itself home with us at the end of the night. We're not quite sure what happened to it. We headed to the location to drop off our car and then rode in a big yellow bus to the park. Mackenzi was so excited about her first ride in a school bus!

The Festival was huge, with booths all over the place, and people dressed up in all kinds of costumes. It was a lot of fun. The kids got to get a little bit of candy, a balloon, and then we ate nachos and corny dogs like you would at the state fair. It was fun. The line took quite a while, but we finally managed to get our food. Rockway, our church, had a booth set up as well, and so Natasha and I had signed up to help "man" the booth by passing out candy and cards with Rockway's info on it. Mackenzi and Jeremiah had fun helping out by passing out candy, and eating as much as they could with us not knowing it! :)

There were tons of bounce houses, a tractor led train ride, and a petting zoo. It was late when we got back to our car, but everyone still had fun on the bus ride back. I